“Life’s a box of chocolates” said a certain Forest Gump and then he went on to add that you ‘never know what you are going to get”. Now if he had been talking about a bag of revels I could have agreed – by the way why do people dislike the coffee flavoured ones – as you stick your hand in the pack and have no idea what you are pulling out. But a box of chocolates always comes with a little drawing and a description. If you want orange centred you can have orange centred. If you want fudge then you can choose fudge.
But chocolates is one thing, selecting an escort for an evening of intimate companionship is quite another. When I look at the photographs of the myriad pretty women on the Buckinghamshire Escorts web site I am flummoxed. Now that’s not a word I use often but it’s the only one that can adequately describe my state of mind. I see one perfect princess and think, yes, that busty blonde girl has caught my eye, stolen my heart and excited the passion of my soul. But then I see another seriously sexy siren and I think: well, actually, that brunette escort, the girl next door type, pert and pretty, wholesome and innocent, she has to be my companion choice tonight.
I wonder if they can install a random escort generator on the Essex and Buckinghamshire Escorts’ web-sites? That way I can let lady luck intervene and turn flummoxed into fabulous fantasy fulfilled!
By Alice Lovelace